This week, I spent a couple of hours in an incredible shelter for women who are survivors of domestic violence.
Edel House: in the heart of Cork City provides emergency accommodation for families and single women who are courageous beyond belief.
Suzanne – a deeply caring and dedicated staff member invited me to share some parenting principles with mothers at Good Shepherd Cork.
When I arrived, I was a little nervous to be honest.
I questioned whether this Adlerian parenting approach would be enough to meet the participants’ parenting challenges.
Within minutes, these mums shared with me that the future they imagined for their children was very similar as the hundreds of fellow parents I had asked before them.
These wonderful care-givers left me in awe.
Some were taking in new learning while entertaining children and volunteering to co-facilitate an experiential Positive Discipline activity.
After recent “Embracing Boundaries” trainings with parents, I noticed that particularly women can be extremely hard on themselves and feel discouraged.
Some believe they have to get it right all the time and see losing their patience as a weakness.
A strong-willed daughter or son are inviting their parent to learn about self-regulation.
They get experience and know what a balanced relationship feels like.
A child needs one healthy adult in their life:
🌱 whom they can trust
🌱 feel respected & protected by
🌱 and listened to
so they can open up and talk.
In recent years, I’ve been helping parents to find answers on how to allow other parenting styles in their child’s life. (Unless it’s abusive)
Brining awareness back to their own influence and how to have power with the child, feels so energising and leaves time to recharge – my clients notice.
This confidence in my ability not needing to control how other adults interact with my own children has been replacing resentment with peace.
Working with me does not mean conflict-free and happily ever after.
What I offer you is to feel capable moving through the tougher parenting days and enjoying your child before you have an empty nest.
Same as the homeless yet sheltered and love-filled mothers whose fearlessness is changing their child’s trajectory - which subtle change are you celebrating as a parent today?
Happy Mothering Sunday (Ireland & UK)
(Confirming humanity: written by annett)
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